Monday, April 20, 2026

QUAND EST-QUE L'EGO MEURT?


When I think about how my good friend Currado Malaspina is coping with the aging process, when I think about the accumulated wisdom one would expect from an acclaimed French artist and intellectual, one inevitable question comes to mind.

When does the ego die?

Malaspina has been spending more and more time in Los Angeles working on his bizarre series of watercolors depicting the entire breadth of Washington Boulevard. I've been watching his legendary bombast temper into something more nuanced, more lyrical, though certainly not any less aggrandizing.




I confess that with all my years of living in southern California, it has only been through Currado's operatic sweep through our grungy streets that I have discovered the beauty of our sun-drenched, casually designed concrete hodgepodge of urban utilitarianism.

I'm astonished by his energy.

In the case of Currado Malaspina, the ego remains undiminished. 



 

Saturday, November 15, 2025

LE HASARD


The last 18 months of Currado Malaspina’s life were spent in solitude and obscurity. Shamed into silence, (that in itself is a notable achievement for a French man), scorned by the public and abandoned by his friends, Malaspina withered like a vine. 

 

At least those are the facts as we know them. 

 

But like all facts, there are plenty of alternatives.

 

The variation I gravitate toward the most is the one that has Currado retiring to the Dodecanese Islands where he lives with his two cats Pèlleas and Mélisande. I prefer this to the pathetic image of Malaspina sitting in his cramped kitchen hunched over Le Monde and nibbling on soggy day-old croissants[1]

 

Another theory puts Currado in southern California where he is attempting to replicate his flânerie on the unaccommodating streets of Los Angeles. 

 

I even heard a rumor that he changed his name to Augustus Szapiro and is publishing a weekly column in the Stijl section of the Dutch periodical Esthetiek en ideeën. 

 

What gives all these theories a modicum of credibility is that aside from a short announcement in L’Humanité, Malaspina’s death went virtually unnoticed. There was no formal funeral or memorial service, no public acknowledgement from the Ministry of Culture, no obituaries in the mainstream press, not even any statement from his former gallery. The only ‘real’ evidence of Malaspina’s death came in the form of mean-spirited chatter on social media and an empty Cité de l’Ameublement apartment.

 

I went to Paris in the summer of 2025 in order to visit that apartment. I knocked on the door of the concierge, a spry octogenarian named Simone, who welcomed me as if I were a prodigal nephew. She offered little in the way of concrete information but was cordial enough to serve me tea and biscuits while regaling me in her own particular form of Curradology. 

 

I learned from Simone that Malaspina, though notably diminished, would still take his café au lait at the local Tabac. She said that he would always come home with his fingers stained in multi-colored ink. She was constantly wiping away the blue or red or pink fingerprints he left on the light switches in the stairwell. She showed me a few small sketchbooks that were left behind in his apartment after he abruptly moved out. She eagerly accepted the three-hundred euro I offered for the lot of them. She certainly had no idea what they might have been worth. 

 

The contents of these sketchbooks had an eerie coherence. Unsurprisingly, they were obsessive. They focused on one particular woman of a certain age who seems to be carefully observed from a distance. There is nothing untoward in Malaspina’s renderings but they are unmistakably compulsive. 


 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  



[1] This is, in fact, a fair description of a photograph, taken by a paparazzo and published in L’art oscure in February 2025

Tuesday, November 4, 2025

Je est un autre



Currado Malaspina, Paris, 1997


My good friend Currado Malaspina's malevolent attempt to cast doubt on my physical existence is just his latest piece of "conceptual effacement." For years, Malaspina has exploited the credulity of his public by creating personae, flooding the art world with redundancy and disinformation. Inventions like Dahlia Danton, Micah Carpentier, Spark Boon, and Boris Lemon might have amused Parisian Post-Structuralist café society, but to us Americans it simply looks like lies.

Now, exploiting our vague resemblance (I actually don't see it). He is publicly, loudly, and relentlessly claiming that I too am one of his fabrications.

David Schoffman, Los Angeles 2025




Monday, October 6, 2025

RESIGNATION

 


My dear colleague Currado Malaspina is suffering from a crisis of creativity. For years considered the vicar of the French avant-garde, he has recently slipped into irrelevance and neglect.

"Les jeunes s'en fichent de moi," is how he describes his predicament. And while the young people find his work silly and out of step with the times, his contemporaries are taking great pleasure in witnessing his downfall.

Currado now spends his days sipping weak coffee at his local tabac and sketching his fellow patrons.

Sunday, July 6, 2025

TALL TALES TALL BUILDINGS

Rue Gouttefrais, St. Jaen-pla-de-corts


Some people can't believe that my dear friend Currado Malaspina grew up in St. Jean-pla-de-corts. He doesn't have a trace of an accent. His small town roots are not something he advertises. He rarely goes back there to visit but when he does he makes it a point to make a little sketch of the street where he lived as a child. 

Rue Gouttefrais does not have five-story buildings but in Currado's renderings he imagines a street that does. It is an expression of what the Italian philosopher Italo Schachi called "memoria ambiziosa"  - the primal impulse that is at the root of lying ("l'impulso primordiale che è alla radice della menzogna"). 

I've known Currado for nearly 50 years and the one consistent attribute that he carries with him from youth to old age is his mendacity.


At least he leaves us with some pretty decent watercolors.


 

Tuesday, June 3, 2025

INTERNATIONAL RELATIONS



My dear friend Currado Malaspina has been spending a lot of time in Los Angeles. His rue d'A'bbeville flat is being renovated after a water main burst and flooded his bedroom and library. I feel for him. I have a lot of compassion for him. Nobody deserves that type of misfortune, even if that type of misfortune pales in comparison with other, more dire calamities.


Currado has been staying with me. He's sleeping on my couch and he follows me every day into the studio. He photographs me. He does sketches of me while I drink my coffee and eat my bagel. He rides shotgun in my car and turns off NPR because he claims his English isn't good enough to understand it.



He sneaks into my studio in the middle of the night and turns all his sketches and his photographs into large drawings whose subject is the uneventful nature of my life. He says that a French artist would never live like I live. A French artist, he says, would drink an espresso every morning at his neighborhood Tabac and trade gossip with the locals. He says a French artist would make a bigger production of lunch and not content himself with half a peanut butter sandwich and an apple.


He says that the way I live offends him and that he can't wait to return to Paris.


At last we agree.







 
 




Wednesday, December 18, 2024

DRAWING: A REASSESSMENT

 


On a recent trip to the United States, my dear friend Currado Malaspina took in a Yankee game (or maybe it was a Knick game), met with his principal dealer, Doloras Shem-Totan, and made a few sketches in his various notebooks.

I sat for him, as did various other colleagues and acquaintances.

The whole process got us thinking.

Saturday, November 2, 2024

Currado Malaspina's Chez-d'oeuvre inconnu



My dear comrade Currado Malaspina sees himself as a modern day Frenhofer.


The truth is, he has all the tragedy and none of the talent.

His recent artist book inspired by Balzac's classic fable is charming and sad in equal measure.

Saturday, October 26, 2024

 

@currado6

Much to my astonishment, the decaying, calcified, out-of-step luddite, Currado Malaspina has joined the ranks of TikTok influencers. 

This is both good and bad news.

On the good side, it signals his sentience.

The bad side is all too obvious.

Saturday, February 10, 2024

THE LAST OF THE GREAT FLÂNEURS


My dear, eccentric comrade Currado Malaspina, is a relic. He has no cell phone and therefore, no Google Maps. His complete absence from life online has given him no other alternative than to adhere to actual, physical existence. Without texting apparatus or email he is forced to communicate (he is comfortable in at least four languages) with articulated words spoken in full or near-full sentences.

His attention span is still intact and his memory is unfailing. Though he owns a bicycle, he prefers to walk.

As he walks, on occasion he stops, and when he stops he sketches.

Above is an old accordion notebook annotated in english. 



 

Saturday, July 15, 2023

BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE

 


Unlike many of my New York colleagues, my good friend, the French artist Currado Malaspina loves Los Angeles. He visits the city religiously twice a year (though he rarely lets me know he's in town, preferring to spend his time with a bevy of sycophants, art collectors and Hollywood B-listers).

Knowing that both California and his native Paris are doomed to climate catastrophe, he has taken it upon himself to chronicle every detail of each city with some form of visual representation.

The video above is just one of the hundreds of sketchbooks he has devoted to this sanguine lamentation.  

Friday, July 7, 2023

THE SWEET GUIDE

 


I've often wondered what animates my dear, eccentric comrade Currado Malaspina. He has many strange habits and obsessions. He wears scarves in summer, he collects wind chimes and garden ornaments and he reads and rereads Dante in Italian without understanding a word.

His latest folly is imagining Beatrice Portinari as a celestial seducer luring an earnest and vulnerable Alighieri into spasms of desire. His illuminated Paradiso which he impishly titled "La Dolce Guida," is weird and beautiful.

Though still far from finished, we can get an idea of what it might look like by this misleading video:


Wednesday, February 22, 2023

Paris and Los Angeles: Sister Cities Not Exactly On Speaking Terms


My good friend Currado Malaspina loves to walk. In Paris, this is not unusual. It is not even unusual to interrupt a walk in order to make a few sketches. In Paris, Malaspina is a sparrow in a tree.

Los Angeles is something else. Walking in Los Angeles, though far from a felony, is still something rather freakish. Combine that with squatting on a curb with pen and ink, and you've got yourself an anomaly.

Luckily, squatting on a curb in L.A. is a commonplace and as long as Currado is not publicly defecating, folks leave him alone. 

Friday, May 27, 2022

IN EXCHANGE FOR WORDS

The tragedy of Currado Malaspina is too petty, too puerile, too insignificant to serve as a cautionary tale. Malaspina is a silly, gifted man. His reputation in France has never suffered from his serial scandals. Quite the contrary. But to American sensibilities, his chest-thumping maleness is a putrid remnant of a discredited time.



 

Perhaps this graphic record will suffice.

Monday, January 31, 2022

WATER(COLOR) UNDER THE BRIDGE


My dear colleague, the French artist Currado Malaspina, is not the most tactful person I know. We met years ago at a conference in Lyon that had something to do with contemporary European painting and he made a deep impression upon me.

He was no more likable then, then he is now.

At the time he had just inherited the directorship of this oddball, neo-Dada artist collective called The Plausible Deniability Project™ (PDP™). He heart wasn't in it. He passed most of the leadership responsibilities to the California painter Dahlia Danton, an artist of modest ability known mostly for her conspicuous indifference to irony. Benefiting from the prestige the republic of France inexplicably grants to loud men in positions of authority, Malaspina turned PDP™ into a lightening rod for Twitter-ready controversy.

His luck may have run out.

"Malaspina est annulé," is the latest headline in the Parisian art press. It seems that some were triggered by his latest show at Valéry Contemporain. 

I'm curious. Perhaps there's more to the story than these trifling little watercolors.














 

Sunday, June 13, 2021

NEVER BY THE BOOK, TILL NOW

Never in my wildest imagination could I have predicted that my good friend Currado Malaspina would agree to subject himself to this type of aesthetic paraphrase.

But, in the age of rupture and fragmentation, I guess it all makes sense.

And actually .... he makes a few good points.


 

Wednesday, October 23, 2019

THE VIEW FROM THE SEINE

Though my dear comrade and rival Currado Malaspina rarely leaves the cozy confines of the 10ème, his familiarity with the popular cultural trends of the United States is pretty uncanny. 


Though I have lived in Los Angeles for a quarter of a century, I was not familiar with Day Spas, Avocado Toast, Naked Yoga, Medical Marijuana, Cryotherapy, Ojai, Coachella or Self-Care until Currado brought them to my attention.

And I have to say, he is always spot-on!

He has unfailing taste and I have yet to be disappointed by his recommendations.

I have to confess that when he suggested that I start listening to podcasts I asked him if it was on AM or FM! But, after a few guided interventions he succeeded in helping me purchase a smartphone and acquire the appropriate 'apps.'

The very first podcast he recommended was Timmy Black Presents: The Lives of Contemporary Artists. 

I honestly didn't get it at first. I think it went over my head. But after a few binging sessions I became an avid fan. (I actually met Timmy Black, years ago, when we were both young artists struggling to get by. He was working as a bartender and I was working as a sous-chef at Carp and Sea 'Em in Venice!)

Anyway - if you haven't heard about this, I urge you to start listening as soon as possible.

Sunday, December 16, 2018

MALASPINA'S ON THE MONEY

My good friend, Currado Malaspina recently suggested that in order to alleviate my prolonged, chronic posture of bitter alienation I should subscribe to a few pointy-headed podcasts.

After experimenting with "Sheila Houpelle Speaks in Tongues" (too obscure), "The Frat Race" (too violent), "Politicalia" (too strident) and "Récits Scolaires" (too French), I finally found the right one!

Now I'm hooked! Once again, Currado Malaspina has demonstrated his refined, eclectic tastes and his wayward yet classy predilections.